What makes Christmas?

So it's December and I'm about to have the first Christmas without my Dad and we are all still living through a pandemic. The circumstances for this seasonal period is dramatically different from previous years. But what really makes Christmas?

I’ve been contemplating what I need to do during this month. Truthfully I've been resisting preparing for the seasonal festivities. Not really wanting to do anything festive. While my inner Scrooge made me think of all the stressing over preparation, the overspending, all the time involved etc. I mean after all, is it really necessary? But I realise that Christmas is an idea based on expectations and past experiences for it to look and feel a certain way. That maybe the ideas are based on some films or stories, filled with glitter, magic and some guy dressed up in a Santa Claus outfit. Also it's about how everyone “should be" or act in a certain way during this time. But then in reality when you experience outcomes which are contrary to those expectations, it's easy to end up feeling negative, frustrated or even angry and upset. But it doesn’t have to be this way. Christmas may of started off as a Christian celebration of the birth of Christ but different traditions has developed over the centuries. From having Christmas trees, presents and even Father Christmas or Santa Claus.

To me Christmas is about people coming together and to sharing a meal which tends to be filled with foods traditionally only had a Christmas, such as mince pies, Christmas pudding and turkey. But its also period of reflection and creating for the next year.

It is possible to get impacted by things we can't control. From Covid19 restrictions, travel issues, the weather etc. But we can equally create our Christmas period from choosing what we can be responsible for. It's possible I can bring to my family harmony and peace during this period. Also I could be emotionally upset during this time and I've accepted that it's ok to be upset. Just allowing myself to be with my emotions is more of acceptance and being able to be with my grief.

It may not be easy without Dad, especially for my Mum. But I know that my emotions don't have to stop me experiencing Christmas. This is a new Christmas and a new phase of our lives which doesn't have to be based on the past. We can as a family at least come together and look back and share the memories of our Dad over this Christmas time.

I want to share this with you all, so that maybe you can think about what you are willing to create for your Christmas or this seasonal period. Your Christmas can be whatever way you want it to be. That's my wish for you.